Celebrate Vs Not goin to celebrate

Everybody is unique n CNY give diffrent meaning to different person. Tonight was my second time within one week fall down on the floor. As usual I wonder am i still goin to stay alive or not.. can i move my body or not.... If tonight I back to heaven, will i regret not to celebrate CNY? I am sure the answere is no. Anyway i will feel sad cause cant finish those homemade cookies baked by my Chung Ling's boy. I will feel very disappointed cause I havent taste another homemade cookies baked by last year 5SA3's student. Both baked cookies for me with their sincere heart, so how could i leave before i manage to taste it? My year 2009 3TA2 plan to hv karaok at my place, I cant just go like that without listening to their sweet n sour voice...oh ya, my 5SP1's students visiting! isnt it that the moment when they able to step forward n stand firm with others classes students is the moment that I am always waiting for? Another gang from 5SA4 who managed to catch my heart even i am not their form teacher...n my 5SB3 students that i have to let go due to my work load...i havent have a chance to prove to them that to me they are always my students even i am no longer teaching them after CNY...my CF members...I cant let them down when they need me...they are wonderful God's soldiers...finally i found a small group of students who share the same dream with me in Chung Ling... is it the time for me to leave now? If i really back to heaven tonight, my beloved Miri students will not know about it. They might think that i already forget about them...forget about all my promisses to meet up with them...forget about those sweet old days in Miri...I wish to say goodbye to all my beloved young friends from miri before i leave...my family members...they will miss me alot...i wish to see my the only nephew grow up...i dun want my mum to send my dead body away...i really dun want to cause her tears drop because of me...she is a good mother...a gentle old lady...whether i am suppose to leave or to stay alive, the power is not in my hand! I am just an ordinary servant of God! I thank God for His mercy n love for me n in me! With grateful heart I thank You, Lord for allowing me to still stay alive for this moment. I like CNY because of the marvellous meet...but besides that, i still cant find any reason to celebrate CNY...so, I wont regret if I din celebrate CNY...